“You cannot find yourself by only looking to yourself, because in essence that is not where you are. The real you is an expanded self, literally one with the entire world. And so we find ourselves in relationship to the whole. We cannot be happy unless we are wishing everyone the same”. – The Gift of Change, Marianne Williamson.
I read the words above and thought of my journey so far. Thankfully I survived the crazy teen years where every emotion is amplified and magnified to engulf our worlds. I remember how sadness was heartbreak and happiness absolute euphoria, nothing was small or insignificant. I was at such mercy to the way I felt. I am now 23 and calmed down a little bit. Yes I still have some way to go but even through the transition from teen to young woman, I have found that the only way for me to truly find myself was to look beyond me. The problem with youth is that the self is the most important person. Me, myself and I is the only rule that applies and it takes some cajoling and training to learn that the world does not revolve around us. In fact the world is better tasted when we realise there is more than ourselves.
Something amazing happens when we are able to look past ourselves. Being self centered is a contracted sense of self. There is only so much that we can experience if we do not take an interest in other people’s thought, opinions and emotions. When I first really started to care about how those around me felt it was awkward and almost over bearing to have to consider another’s emotions. However once it became a habit to think in love and consider others, a whole new world opened up to me. I was less hard headed and less stressed. I understood that not getting my own way was sometimes a God send and most importantly – that the way others see the world can sometimes be a great help.
It was incredibly liberating to let go of the burden of always having to be right. The more I took in, filtered and made sense of the world, the more I understood my place in it. Sometimes we find ourselves wrapped up in confusion and fear because we have shut all the windows to anything outside. Maybe a previous hurt or let down has caused you to raise your guards, yes pain should teach us something and make us a little weary but we should not shut down altogether. Do not allow yourself to be swallowed by the lie of loneliness. The fullest way to live is in love, open to the opportunities and experiences life has for us.
Of course you should apply wisdom but live with a heart willing to expand!
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