Playing life and setting boundaries.

The more I live I see that life is actually a game and it is up to us to choose how we play it. Some are reckless and step over everybody and anybody to get where there want, whereas some are so feeble and fickle and let everybody else step over them in a bid to try and make everyone else happy. Yesterday evening I changed into my comfy clothes: hoody – check, pj bottoms – check, warm socks – check and with my teeny pink netbook perched on my duvet covered legs, began thinking about the way I was choosing to ‘play’ life. You see I am a Christian so ultimately I have decided to try and get as close to God a possible and let Him lead but that does not mean that I have no desires, passions and dreams of my own. Sometimes these dreams are in line with what I feel God wants me to do and at other times they completely contradict my belief in Him. It is a constant process of review, sitting to read my Bible and spending moments of quiet meditation to just listen and simply be. I am currently going through a massive process of transition. There are a lot of great opportunities lined up in front of me (International modelling, book release) this year but at the same time I know that I can easily get sidetracked if I do not set some solid boundaries for myself.

So…what brought on this thought process? It was not completely random…Last weekend I had my first ever TV interview and as nerve wracking as it was, I think I did ok. However there was one slip of the tongue I made and if the show producers do not edit the tape accordingly, could present me in a distorted light. The minute the words came out of my mouth I wanted to gather them all back in and wish no – one heard but life does not work like that. There are things that we do, sometimes very small things that show us to be something we are not. It is like that one moment then defines us. Even though you and I know that it is a superficial definition, to the outside world (namely those who barely know us but also have the most to say), it seems that this single moment characterizes us.

So I am now taking time out to rehearse and understand my boundaries. I do not want to be caught off guard again. I now understand why people say practise what you are going to say. The more I think about it the more I see that life itself is very artificial. How many authentic moments do we really have?

 Nissi x

27 Comments

  1. parul says:

    Very profound, like all your other posts.
    It is very important to know your “agenda” in life if I may call it that, and stick to it! 🙂
    I was going through exactly same thoughts this morning for my own reasons.
    Very insightful!

  2. reading-stars says:

    Life is real and life is earnest and understanding another person’s reality of their life brings you closer to your own goal. Humanity has a middle ground because we are not Gods or players. An inspirational post … perspectives are ever changing throughout life. ❤

  3. Cat Forsley says:

    Authenticity ! Well written.
    When we are truly authentic to ourselves – it shines outwards ……. Great writing
    xx
    C

  4. I think sometimes those “Defining moments” are in reality for us…to help mold us into the person we should be and to awaken in us something that we need to be more aware of. Nice post.

  5. nelle says:

    What most matters is not how something represents you, it is how you live and see yourself. So while a errant snippet might be aired, you know who you are. Stay true, and it all will sort for you in very real, not artificial ways.

    Life is change, but it is also about growth, and growth is learning. We cease learning (in the larger sense), we atrophy. We all err, and sometimes we misjudge. Taking stock and evaluating is healthy, so too is recognising we cannot change some things but we can choose and change where need be, the path we follow.

  6. Jane Sadek says:

    In my younger days, a reporter for the Dallas Morning News interviewed me at a concert in Lee Park. It was one of those roving reporter kind of things and we chatted for 15-20 minutes. In the end she said she might use my comments in her article and asked me if that would be OK. Since we’d spent the time discussing the arts in Dallas, I figured I’d end up with something profound quoted in the daily paper. Instead, some throw away line, like “I like to be where things are happening,” made it to print. Since then I’ve been firmly convinced that journalist are trained to make people sound as inane as possible.

  7. Susan Michaels says:

    This is a compelling topic. We all deal with situation like this in life. Not long ago at an interview I had the HR screener say the company was ‘hoity toity’ who I was interviewing for, and at first I was hurt, because I thought — well, I’ve officially lost my ‘groove’. But then I talked with God and He said, “Trust me,” and tough as it was to do at the time, I waited and ended up with a far better situation about 3 weeks down the road, and couldn’t be happier! I agree with your reader Nelle, and I really wouldn’t give the interview mix up a second thought or worry about ‘playing the game’. In the ‘game’ of media, what’s a glitch one day is often forgotten or gone the next…and it could even turn around into a ‘win’. #1 …in life, as we keep it real with God and trust Him as you’re doing, God always sees us through and maps out a future so amazing, it leaves us breathless…Trust Him. (Proverbs 3:5,6) (Jeremiah 29:11)

    1. Thank you for this encouraging reply Susan. Proverbs 3: 5 -6 is one of my favourite verses and always brings me back to relying in God and finding peace in Him even when I do not understand what is going on.

  8. Michelle says:

    Being true to yourself at all times is really hard….I truly beleive that we are all here learning lessons and I agree with Nelle, when we stop learning …we stop growing. I try to make decisions and live using my “internal compass”…if it feels right for me, for my values and morals, I move on but if it does not sit right with me I leave it. Sometimes, as in your interview, I realise…after the fact that it did not feel right, particularily when put on the spot…but that is when I chalk it up as a lesson learned and try to remember for next time. I truly beleive that we are happiest, healthiest and at most peace when living true to ourselves.

    1. Thanks for your insight Michelle. I too believe that we are happiest being true to ourselves.

  9. adalamar says:

    What a great post, and so true. Many times we must rehearse or be aware of what we say and do. And that is not always a bad thing. The more we are in the public eye, the more we must do this. It makes us appreciate the authentic moments all the more…

    1. Ada you hit the nail on the head with this one. I am definitely enjoying the simplest, smallest and yet authentic moments a lot more.

  10. Michelle says:

    Your post makes me think of one of my favourite quotes………….
    “Be careful of your thoughts, for your thoughts become your words.
    Be careful of your words, for your words become your actions.
    Be careful of your actions, for your actions become your habits.
    Be careful of your habits,for your habits become your character.
    Be careful of your character, for your character becomes your destiny.”
    Author unknown
    I think it is one of those lessons that needs to be reaffirmed again and again.

    1. Thanks for this Michelle. The words are so very true and yet time and time again I find myself letting my thoughts and therefore my actions slip. These words are a beautiful and simple reminder of ways to keep ourselves in check.

  11. scroungelady says:

    I agree we only have seconds to make an impression. However, we’re more focused on our missteps than others are, because they’re so focused on their own! I like that you are considering all the opportunities described. Our pastor said last week that God is always talking to us, but when do we chose to listen? What would we learn to do if we did listen?

  12. great post! As always. Gives us something to think about. At the end of the day, it is about us, and how we wish to be in relation to the world.

  13. gladlad says:

    Thanks for liking my Skyrim post! Your site is great– nice to stumble on a happy, glowing committed Christian. You write very inspirational stuff. Check out my other blog at tetheredhawk.wordpress.com! Have a great day!

  14. willofheart says:

    this is so true because impressions last but this is reality we sometimes experience this we all are, I agree with Ada also being a public figure most of the time need to be careful on everything u say, but I guess people need to understand that we are only human we tend to commit mistakes…
    I am nominating you for Versatile Bloggers Award pls. follow link at http://willofheart.wordpress.com/2012/01/19/yay-for-the-awards/ …. 🙂

  15. karahill says:

    Well said, and a good reminder. I am enjoying reading your blog…make me feel good.

    1. Thanks so much Kara. Knowing that you enjoy the blog is very heartwarming x

  16. kairoskingdomwomen says:

    I see by reading your blog that you “get” and understand “All things work together for those that Love the Lord and are called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28 – May the Lord increase and promote you in His Path in 2012.

  17. It’s interesting how you are pondering these things that I also consider on a moment to moment basis, but that have taken me a longer life to place focus on. Authenticity to me is continually honing, pruning, rooting out that which has been conditioned in us; that which does not resonate to our deepest being. Who are we, really? What do we stand for, at our core? In our hearts and in our souls?

  18. Michelle says:

    How true Bela….we spend the first half of our life being conditioned and hopefully the second half unconditioning ourselves and uncovering our true self….our soul self.

  19. This is a really good write. Thanks for your honesty and your heart for God.

    Great having you stop by newviewfromhere ….hope to see you there again some time!

  20. hopewinds says:

    Down to earth and truly real. The essence of life on this side can sweeten your next appearance.. Keep at it, encouragement is rewarding.

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