‘Light up the world with a match stick’ – Chuka Royalty.

Do you ever find yourself frustrated with the world and the people in it. People can wear their plastic smiles and everyone is so keen to ‘fit in’ when we were all born different?! I read somewhere that one of the most tragic things is to die a copy when we were all born to be unique. I realised some years ago that I did not want to be like everyone pone else. I set my heart on being extraordinary. However to think something and follow through with action is not always the easiest thing. In fact sometimes it can be very hard.

We can often make decisions but the opinions and input of others can make us reconsider our previous convictions. I fell into the trap of allowing too many people into my thought process. I found I could not please everyone and the frustration and stress of expectations was too much. I had to do some soul searching and discover my life’s purpose. Why was I created? What can I bring to the earth? How can I show God’s love to people? How can I live every day with passion?

The thoughts led me to what I believe my life purpose is: to be an inspirational writer and singer. However with any journey there are obstacles and turns in the road that can make you think that somewhere along the line you got it wrong. Sometimes even friends and family can make you think you do not know who you are. When you feel pressed upon do not give up on you. You should not give up on you because your creator hasn’t. God has you alive for a reason.

Here’s a great song to keep you going.

As Chuka Royalty says “You can light up the world with a matchstick!”

SHINE

Nissi x

Buy my book ‘Finding Me’ for £1.97 here: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Finding-Me-ebook/dp/B006VOJQZY/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1338505361&sr=8-1

Living life to the full!

“You cannot find yourself by only looking to yourself, because in essence that is not where you are. The real you is an expanded self, literally one with the entire world. And so we find ourselves in relationship to the whole. We cannot be happy unless we are wishing everyone the same”. – The Gift of Change, Marianne Williamson.

I read the words above and thought of my journey so far. Thankfully I survived the crazy teen years where every emotion is amplified and magnified to engulf our worlds. I remember how sadness was heartbreak and happiness absolute euphoria, nothing was small or insignificant. I was at such mercy to the way I felt. I am now 23 and calmed down a little bit. Yes I still have some way to go but even through the transition from teen to young woman, I have found that the only way for me to truly find myself was to look beyond me. The problem with youth is that the self is the most important person. Me, myself and I is the only rule that applies and it takes some cajoling and training to learn that the world does not revolve around us. In fact the world is better tasted when we realise there is more than ourselves.

Something amazing happens when we are able to look past ourselves. Being self centered is a contracted sense of self. There is only so much that we can experience if we do not take an interest in other people’s thought, opinions and emotions. When I first really started to care about how those around me felt it was awkward and almost over bearing to have to consider another’s emotions. However once it became a habit to think in love and consider others, a whole new world opened up to me. I was less hard headed and less stressed. I understood that not getting my own way was sometimes a God send and most importantly – that the way others see the world can sometimes be a great help.

It was incredibly liberating to let go of the burden of always having to be right. The more I took in, filtered and made sense of the world, the more I understood my place in it. Sometimes we find ourselves wrapped up in confusion and fear because we have shut all the windows to anything outside. Maybe a previous hurt or let down has caused you to raise your guards, yes pain should teach us something and make us a little weary but we should not shut down altogether. Do not allow yourself to be swallowed by the lie of loneliness. The fullest way to live is in love, open to the opportunities and experiences life has for us.

Of course you should apply wisdom but live with a heart willing to expand!

Nissi xx

Buy my ebook ‘Finding Me’ here for only £1.97 http://www.amazon.co.uk/Finding-Me-ebook/dp/B006VOJQZY/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1337707049&sr=8-1

Living for more.

The past few days I have had this amazing desire to do more than live for my body and for today. I am keen to enjoy life – yes, I want to live free, in love and passionately but I also want to please God and know that I am living walking in my best self. I believe that we find our best selves when we are not confined and restricted to people’s opinions and expectations of us. When we are able to be happy with ourselves and content in the knowledge that we are working towards being our better selves, there is a peace that accepts progression. Impatience and arrogance to want to jump certain stages of pain and growth can be dangerous. I remember wanting riches, prestige and power without putting in much effort. I was sloppy, lazy and arrogant in my ability – I thought things would simply happen because I am who I am. The glitz and glamour became the idol, that is what I was working towards and there was no substance behind the dream.

Of course things have now changed and I want more than the guise of wealth and success. I want to be fulfilled from the inside out and excel in an area that I am passionate about. I read the following verses yesterday morning and felt encouraged in the radical walk I have decided to take. Some things seem great and the “thing” to do but I know ultimately living to be pure, genuine and loving will reap the best reward.

Ephesians 5:2, 4-5 CEB

Live your life with love, following the example of Christ, who loved us and gave himself for us. He was a sacrificial offering that smelled sweet to God.

Obscene language, silly talk, or vulgar jokes aren’t acceptable for believers. Instead, there should be thanksgiving. Because you know for sure that persons who are sexually immoral, impure, or greedy—which happens when things become gods—those persons won’t inherit the kingdom of Christ and God

>>>Buy my book ‘Finding Me’ for only 1.97 HERE: http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding+me+nissi+mutale&x=0&y=0

Nissi x

 

New Territory: Time to Un – Learn.

Over the last couple of weeks I have taken on writing and leading workshops full time. It has been an exciting, scary yet fulfilling journey and the way God has opened doors is amazing. It is strange how He seems to constantly amaze me! Despite all the great things happening I have found that my mind and the way I view things is my biggest obstacle. The naysayers and other people’s disapproval I have learned to take with  a pinch of salt but my own negative thoughts and unbelief are my own worst enemies at the moment. Thankfully I am aware of the destructive thoughts and when I start thinking fearfully and contracting under a burden of worries, I have to remind myself about how far I have come. I remember how bad it felt to be doing a job that I did not want to do and how hard I worked to come out of that frustrating situation. I also think about the many small miracles and miraculous doors that God has opened. When I have prayed and taken time to meditate on the Word I find that I move from fear to faith and something within me trusts that since God has brought me thus far, He is unlikely to leave me now.

A question a lot of people often ask me about my references to God’s leading is: How do I know that it is Him. There is no set way to hear God’s voice. The only way I can describe it is: the more time I spend in quiet time, shutting out the confusion and noise of the world, focusing on the words I read in the Bible or the words of a worship song, there are certain things that come to mind and I know that it is more than me. It is a stronger conviction. I spent a long time trying to explain away and delay these convictions previously and have found myself in a frustrated and vexed place. I have had to learn to distinguish my own good ideas from God ideas and submit myself to the will and prompting of the Holy Spirirt.

An important part of this journey has been un – learning the almost reflex negative thought pattern. I got so used to explaining why I could not do something or looking at the obstacles that I forgot how Big and Awesome God is. I now know that when I am taking a step of faith it is imperative that I focus on God. When I am wrapped in the arms of His Word and empowered by the Holy Spirit there is no room for doubt. I am able to take new territory in my stride and achieve way beyond I could have done should I have been consumed by own doubts. Often we can keep ourselves bound in situations we hate because we are too scared to take a step. Just one step. That step is to take our eyes of ourselves and focus on God.

Nissi x

Don’t forget to get your copy of my debut book ‘Finding Me’ HERE – only 1.97: http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding+me+nissi+mutale&x=0&y=0

The Burden of Perfection

Getting things right is great. Getting things done well is even better. Perfection is absolutely phenomenal! However I used to be a perfectionist and it also stopped me from taking action for the fear that it would not be perfect. Sometimes we have dreams , visions and goals. We have plans and projects we want to start but because the first time may not result in a perfect product we put it off. We meet someone of the opposite sex but because they are not fit into the tick box fairytale criteria we created, we reject them. I few years ago I noticed that my strive for perfection paralysed my life and my growth by making me inanimate. I did not do anything unless I was absolutely sure that I would get perfection.

Now do not get me wrong, it is great to aim high. However aiming high and only settling for perfection are two very different things. The perfectionist believes that the only result other than perfection is failure, whereas the person who aims high understand that all things have room for improvement and any result always has something good that can be celebrated.

Writing my first book I learned that it was more important to take action as opposed to dreaming and lusting after perfection. I now believe that nothing is every truly perfect and one of the joys of life is being able to aim higher and do better. To think that there is no room for improvement is a dangerous place to be.

Buy my book ‘Finding Me’ for only £1.97 here: http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding+me+-+nissi+mutale&x=0&y=0

Nissi x

The most intimate relationship I have ever known.

I am very fortunate because from a young age I have known real love. I never knew at the time that I always had it but as I’ve grown and been through the bumps and curves we have come to know as life, I now believe that I have had the blessing of experiencing real love. Many people do a lot of weird and wonderful, cruel and cunning things to feel loved but I have not had to. It is rare for me to feel well and truly alone and I always have somewhere to go no matter what is happening in my life. When I am at my highest point, I have somewhere to go and celebrate and when I am at my lowest, I have somewhere to go and vent, shout and see that things are not as bad as I think they are and will get better. The person I am talking about is God and by reading the Bible, praying and spending time just thinking about the words, I have grown in my relationship with Him.

The best way I can describe it is, you know when you have a favourite musician, artists and authors whom you have managed to collect all their releases, biographies and follow their stories in the press. The more you do this the more you feel you know the person. This is how my relationship with God is but to a higher level because I believe that my time of prayer is not me simply talking to Him. It is also a time for me to listen. I do not hear Him speak to me in a loud and roaring voice. Instead it is in the quietness of my soul that I feel. Words that I read in the Bible that made no sense to me suddenly come to light. Situations that seem impossible suddenly fall into place and a relationship I never thought could be developed or repaired suddenly is. I feel and see that the stuff that happens in my life is way beyond what I can achieve alone and I know that He is there.

When I am hurting or confused I feel His presence most. The comfort and clarity that I receive is amazing. I love the fact that no matter how I am feeling or how bratty I am behaving, He loves me no more or no less. I do not have to compete for His love or do anything to gain more or less of it. Some of my friends question this relationship (don’t they all). They constantly ask why I cannot do certain things or if I am in some sort of slave driver situation. They see God as someone who has simply listed do’s and donts. They say all these things but they have never read the Bible and taken time to try and know Him for themselves. I know that by doing things God’s way, I am living my life the best way. How do I know this?

I believe that God created the Earth and all that is in it – including me. Therefore if He created me surely He knows the best way I function and what I was made for. I am tired of seeking opinions and approval of people who do not even have a clue about their own lives. That’s why I love this relationship. I know that because God knows all of me and has seen me at my worst, best and future better – I have nothing to hide or feel insecure about.

I could go on and on about Him but I’m not going to. No matter how much I waffle it is one of those things you have to experience for yourself.

Nissi x

Buy my book ‘Finding Me’ for only £1.97 here: http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding+me+-+nissi+mutale&x=0&y=0

 

Facing the Pain

My book ‘Finding Me’ explores love and identity in many ways but one of the ways I look at love is by looking at pain. The contradiction of life is that sometimes in order to understand what you do like, you have to know what you do not like. Like most (if not all) teenagers, my feelings and emotions were hyper sensitive:  like become love, dislike became hate – love and hate two words I have grown to understand are incredibly strong and should not be used lightly. However when we are living in certain moments  (especially painful ones) I have found that the way I see the word changes. I either start to look at things with a piercing clarity or get so caught up in the pain that I am unable to see clearly. One of the things I have tried to do with the book is show my readers how pain should not be ignored. Every feeling is so important and while we should be careful not to be driven by our emotions, we also have to make sure that we do not completely ignore them.

I learned so much about myself when I took the time to look past my emotion and try to understand why I felt a certain way. While I am no psychologist I have grown to believe that our emotions are indicators of underlying issues. What I mean by this is I used to lash out at people when I felt threatened, I had a fiery tongue and was never afraid to use it. However my negative comments was only a way of me building barriers to hide my own insecurities. I lashed out at people to put them on their guard and therefore feel secure knowing that they felt threatened. This is just one example. I know people who cry to bring attention away from the fact that they are intentionally spiteful people; there are those who sleep with people to feel loved. Things that we do on an emotional level point to the kind of people we are and the foundations we have.

The lesson in ‘Finding Me’ is that the only secure and unchaginging love I found was in God. I could go through all the rubbish in the world but as long as I was anchored in God, His Word and His Spirit then there is nothing that can consume and overtake me. The Bible puts it as ‘being pressed but not crushed and persecuted but not abandoned’. That is the attitude I have to pain now. I look for the purpose in my pain: what can I learn from this discomfort, how can I better myself through this time of poverty and frustration, is there a way I can find a solution to this problem. I look past the pain to see what the emotion is trying to show me and I sincerely believe that everyone can too.

Buy ‘Finding Me’ for only £1.97 here: http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding+me+-+nissi+mutale&x=0&y=0

Nissi x